Back for a bit/Your Make Everything Ok Button

Tonight I found myself sitting at my computer. I was trying to write. It's been a while and I'm rusty. Word was open, but nothing was there. Just a white screen and vague title in my head. Word is not a creative environment. Microsoft definitely didn't have poetry in mind when they designed that thing.

I caught myself thinking back to this thing. This page. You guys.

It's a lot easier for me to write here. I feel like it has purpose. That what I'm writing isn't just going to end up as a a bunch of ones and zeros shoved into a folder that doesn't really exist on my laptop.

Instead it's just a bunch of ones and zeros slightly more accessible to the rest of the human population with an internet connection.

So bear with me, this wasn't really meant for the internet when I thought of it. It's for someone in particular to be read on a certain day. Feedback would be nice.

I hope they don't remember the URL to my blog.

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Your Make Everything Ok Button.

I watched your hands move on the keyboard.

click

click

Thump went my heart.

click

You were having a bad day. I remember it.

click

Those fingers I know moving slowly. Fluorescents shining off the rings you wore.

click

You needed it to be ok.

click

I needed it to be ok.

click

I needed you to be ok.

click

We'd run out of ideas.

Watching

click

Listening

click

Waiting

click

click

click

I've got to find something.

click

Try something different.

click

I haven't tried everything.

click

thump

.

.

.

You've stopped typing. Hands resting back where they were, but not where I want them.

Your eyes still brimming with liquid pain. Threatening to spill over at any second.

I look up.

Blinded by you and the bright screen in this dark room, I try and focus.

Make everything ok the words read.

Make everything ok.

thump

Theres no secret. No formula. No line of code. No combination of words that do that.

That's not what this is about.

I can do this. I can make it ok.

I can.

Me. Just me.

No, not just me.

Just us.

Everything is ok if we're still here.

No secret. No formula. No line of code. No combination of words is going to stop that.

Everything is ok.

And it'll always be that if we're together.